'Well hop over here and get me a sandwich!' - Tommy Cooper
It's strange isn't it?
You stand in the middle of the library and go "Aaaaaaaaargh!!" and everyone stares at you. But do it on a plane and everyone joins in. - Tommy Cooper
I used to be indecisive but now I am not quite sure. - Tommy Cooper
Now, most dentist's chairs go up and down, don't they? The one I was in went back and forwards. I thought 'This is unusual'. And the dentist said to me 'Mr Cooper, get out of the filing cabinet. - Tommy Cooper
I had a dream last night that I ate a giant marshmellow.
When I woke up this morning, my pillow was gone. - Tommy Cooper